Summer Slide Survival Guide: Keeping Kids Kind, Connected, and Calm
6/3/26
Summer vacation is here and the weather is starting to show it! With less time in the classroom and more time at home, our children’s teachers may have warned us about the potential for a “summer slide.” This is the concept that, when our kid’s academic skills are not utilized over the summer, they will lose some of the academic progress made in the previous school year. Without the normal schedule, routine of school, and the natural social/emotional opportunities children have there, we tend to see an “emotional summer slide” as well. This can look like social and emotional skills becoming a bit rusty as summer progresses.
Summer is a great time to stay emotionally sharp as a family with lower stress levels and increased time spent together. In this article, we’ll look at three simple ways that we can be active in our children’s emotional development and avoid the other summer slide.
The first skill we can help them keep sharp (and ourselves, truthfully) is the skill of emotional reflection and perception. As a parent, I know I fall into the old habit of asking, “How was your day?” far too often. Inevitably, I am met with a response of “good” or silence as my children scan their brain for memories of their entire day. One fun game that can help with this is High, Low, Buffalo. This silly check-in game provides a great opportunity for our kids to share and reflect on the good and the tough parts of their day as critical parts of a total emotional experience. It also allows for them to be silly with us in sharing their “buffalo” which is something random or funny from their day. In sharing back with our children we can model the skills of emotional identification and healthy vulnerability in discussing emotions. As a bonus, our kids can end up sharing some real gut-busters during the “buffalo” part.
Problem solving with our children instead of for our children is another way we can help their emotional brain stay in shape. As parents, we are often pressed for time as we move from one thing to another in and out of the home. One unintended consequence of this is that we tend to solve our children’s problems rather quickly instead of helping them find the right solution with our help. I can think of times where I’ve thought to myself, “It’ll just be faster if I do it.” While this does help me stay on time, it also misses the mark of helping to develop key emotional problem solving skills. The first thing we can do as parents and caregivers is to practice our “pause button.” This means not instantly giving an answer or solution when a complaint or problem arises with our children. This will give us the chance to then think of a good question to help guide them in developing their own skillfulness. Questions like, “What do you think may be a good first step?” and “What’s a way we have handled or could handle this situation?” As we empower our children to solve problems with a sense of autonomy, they avoid the trap of feeling helpless at home and at school once summer ends.
When it comes to socializing, helping our kids set goals for themselves is a simple way that we can help infuse new social strategies into their toolbox. In setting simple goals for a social event our children gain plenty of opportunities for social growth. Before a playdate or day at camp, we can ask our kids to set one goal for themselves. This can be something like, “I want to introduce myself to one new person” or “I’ll find one opportunity to make someone feel included today,” or “Today I’ll be flexible and play a game I don’t like as much so that my friend can do something they like”. In setting short and sweet goals, our kids can see their own growth and reduce occurrences of social anxiety in the future as they go into each outing with a plan. You’ll often find that these goals lead to great reflections during those emotional check-ins or during a round of High, Low, Buffalo.
With these three tools in hand you are ready to make summer a time of connection and growth for your kids. These skills provide us with ways to better our families without pouring in a ton of extra time, but by simply shifting perspective and how we approach moments that already exist. Now when your child arrives back to school in August, they’ll be ahead of the curve and ready to tackle their next academic year!
Have a great summer from all of us at Sacred Heart Counseling to you and yours!
~David Walter, MA, LCPC
Photo by Anna Khromova on Unsplash